About a year ago, Julie K. Miller was on the brink of burnout. She was working in a high-pressure, high-impact environment where the company culture was “All hands on-deck. All the time,” and it was taking its toll.
Burnout. Many of us experience it, yet we rarely talk about it. Anne Helen Petersen almost broke the internet with her Buzzfeed article pegging Millennials as “the burnout generation” earlier this year. We are HUNGRY for conversations that let us know we’re not alone in our overwhelm. I think we need to start getting real about burnout.
Luckily, I found a kindred spirit in Julie, who was already candidly sharing about her post-burnout, pro-self-care transformation on social media. Our shared hope is that, by giving voice to the experience, that more of YOU will feel emboldened to prioritize your SELVES in your careers.
Signs of Burnout
Julie knew she was pushing herself too hard, but struggled to pull back. The team mentality was to push through, and the company she was working for was doing work that was highly visible with far-reaching impact. As Julie puts it, “Every day we got to see the impact that our work had on a global scale and it was very much an addiction. The highs were so high.”
Julie was passionate about her work. Her colleagues were passionate about their work. In many ways, they had communally made a choice to
Julie told me that she had probably hit the point of burnout before she realized it. She was suffering from several common physical and emotional symptoms. Perhaps you’ve experienced some of these before:
Drinking or eating more or less than you normally would
Sleeping erratically
Stress dreams
Declining health
Rise in symptoms from existing conditions
Erratic emotions
Lack of emotional control
For Julie, her red flag came when she was receiving constructive feedback at work.
The indicator listed the traits your Enneagram type would exhibit at your best and at your worst. Julie was getting far too many yesses in her “worst” column. She knew something had to change. Still, as with so many of us, Julie’s commitment to her work and sense of responsibility convinced her to stick it out, “Even though I knew something was wrong I couldn’t leave at that time. I pushed through.”
Julie went another two months until the current cycle of work at her company wrapped up. Then, she went to her boss and said “I’ve got to go.”
Shame, Guilt and the Culture of Busy
As a culture we LOVE to talk to about being BUSY, but we almost never talk about the physical and mental exhaustion that all too frequently results from that BUSY-ness. This creates shame and guilt around these feelings when our reality doesn’t line up with the reality we think we should experience.
This obsession with work – and the underlying belief that our value lies in our productivity – puts us at risk.
I loved a piece of wisdom Julie shared with me: that there are three poisons in life, “sugar, shame and comparing yourself to other people.” In a way, each of these can contribute to burnout in your career. Blood sugar spikes and crashes stress our bodies. Shame keeps us from asking for help or admitting that we are overtaxed. Comparison drives us to make choices in our careers based on what we feel we “should” do, instead of what’s best for us. I think she’s onto something.
The Way Forward
After her experience with burnout, Julie took some time off. She rested for a full two weeks before diving back into the hubbub of life. After spending time with her mom while she recovered from surgery, she and her husband took a trip to Rome. When she returned home to New York she, “…went to every museum and tasted every dumpling in the city…that recovery time was really beautiful.”
Julie took six months off, and when she started looking for work again, she chose to go into something very different from what she had been doing before. She also sought out a company large enough to have a legitimate human resources department and a level of structure. She told me, “At the
That’s not to say the work isn’t demanding or high pressure. In fact, the company is going through a period of high-change and high-growth. Those demands mean Julie has to really focus when she’s at work. It also means that she’ll have the occasional 10 or 12-hour day. But, it’s not the norm. Constant stress and overwork aren’t a part of the company culture. In fact, the whole team works hard to look out for one another (this is something I hear often in healthy work environments).
While Julie is in a support role and isn’t able to create her own schedule, she does still set boundaries.
For example, she tries to keep work at work and her personal time, personal. While her work friends are also personal friends, they’ll briefly talk about work over drinks, but then pivot to other things. When one of the leaders she supports recently texted her at
Slow. Clap.
If you, like Julie, are in your career for the marathon and not the sprint, it’s important to know your own needs and wants in a role, to find an environment that respects and supports those, and to set boundaries for yourself.
Julie’s Wisdom
Since Julie did such a spectacular job of navigating her own experience with burnout and redirecting her career in a way that supports her well-being, I couldn’t help but ask for her best tips around work and well-being.
Sunshine
“I have to see the sun shine every day – natural sunlight. I block time in my calendar every day for that. Fresh air, outside, not with my phone in my hand, not scheduling a meeting. In Seattle it’s hard to do, but it really helps center me.”
Gratitude
“My mom and I text each other three things we’re grateful for each day. In the beginning it was really hard. I’d think, ‘I’m grateful my milk didn’t go bad, or for my green socks.’ Over time, the things I was grateful for became less tangible and easier to come up with, ‘A beautiful spring breeze; that I live next to water.’ Now I text three things I’m grateful for to my girlfriends who are in a tough place.”
Always Pack a Charger
“What is the thing that charges me? My soul, my mission, my motivation? For
Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and story, Julie!
If you’d like to follow Julie, I can tell you she has a truly spectacular Instagram account! You’ll find her at @postdigitalginger
Have a burnout story to share? Comment below!